What it truly means To Bee a Honey

The Grace in Dreaming Big

I needed God to do something about To Bee a Honey but I was not waiting for a miracle to fall from the sky. Moreover, I had given up on my first book; Heartbeat so quick, I knew what giving up felt like and I was determined not to give up so easily again. 

Sometime last year; March 23, 2017, I read a collection of poems titled Her by Pierre Alex Jeanty. I enjoyed the book a lot and around that time, I was working on my second book. I had various options for the title of my second book but I needed something or someone to just validate my confidence in the choice I made. However, while reading Her by Pierre Alex Jeanty, I found a page that caught my heart; Page 80 where he wrote;
“To describe her is to write sweet poetry about the beauty of life and survival.”
This page led me to be certain of my choice in the title of my book; To Bee a Honey. At that time, I did not care to check for information about the author; Pierre Alex Jeanty. All I wanted to do was to read a good book and promote it.
 
Before I self-published To Bee a Honey in August 2017, one thing I learned quickly is that as a self-published author, I had to do a lot towards ensuring the success of my book, like marketing, distributing and advertising my book. I utilized the network of successful writers and friends that I had and I can’t thank them enough for their unending support. Tolu Akinyemi, Kukogho Iruesiri, Daniele Bergamini, Kanyinsola Olorunnisola, Kennypoet, Ibukun Ogunyemi, Patience Lawal, Mr. CJ Njoku, Heych Essien, Seye Kuyinu, Pyrokardia and Olanrewaju Oranyeli. There were days that some of these people took time out of their busy schedule to answer my unending questions and to read the not-so-ready manuscript that I had into perfection. All the conversations that I had with these awesome beings contributed to my belief in To Bee a Honey.
 
Particularly, I remember one day, while discussing with Pyrokardia, the author of Broken Wishes and Empty Spaces and the author of A Beautiful Mess. I had informed him about the other people that I reached out to and he mentioned Amanda Lovelace, the author of The Princess Saves Herself in This One. Pyrokardia informed me about how Amanda Lovelace had accepted a contract for her book to be republished by Andrew McMeel Publishing since it was so successful when she self-published it. Upon hearing that, I said to myself;
“Okay, don’t keep your hopes too high but make sure they are above your head. Maybe you can land a publishing deal too.”

The real question was; “how do I get my book to sell well on Amazon and to get it noticed?” Around that time, I also decided to take a summer internship at Hachette Book Group, one of the top trade publishing companies in the United States. I took this internship with the aim of gaining work experience and particularly, to see how publishing works and how I could help my book. In one meeting, I asked one of my supervisors, Anthony Goff; “how do self-published books get acquired by top publishers?” and he responded that publishing companies usually keep track to see which self-published books is selling on the top 20 and top 100 lists on online bookstores and they would contact the author from there on.
 
The challenge for me was still “how do I get my book to the top?” I knew that it was almost impossible but I was not ready to quit. I had saved up some little money on the side and so, I started doing social media advertisements for my book. Those didn’t turn out well. I also mailed copies of my book to bookstores and did not get any responses. Strand bookstore is very close to where I take my classes at NYU and on some days, in the evening, I would go there and just walk around to keep myself motivated. While soaking myself in the smell of books and in the atmosphere of book-loving people, I would think to myself that it is possible that my book will be acquired by a publisher and that it will find its way to a bookstore like Strand. I would imagine my book on a stand, beside Rupi Kaur’s Milk and Honey or Nayyirah Waheed’s Salt or beside Warsan Shire’s Teaching My Mother How to Give Birth or beside Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s Dear Ijeawele or a Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions. In addition, every time I had the opportunity to meet with someone, either during an interview or for a lunch chat, I would give them a copy of my book. Perhaps, they might know someone that knows someone that knows a publisher that may like my book. That is how they say it works right?  “…it is not what you know but who you know."

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Fast forward to May 1, 2017 (3 months before the release date of To Bee Honey) I had built so much hope in myself. I committed to doing at least one thing about my book every day until a publisher showed interest, even if that one thing was to take a picture and to share on social media. I even customized a notebook with the front cover of To Bee a Honey and in that notebook, every day, I wrote one thing I did concerning To Bee a Honey. 

​I cleared my mind of any excuses and I wrote down positive words that I was attracted to.
Here are some words from a video I saw online in June, that I wrote in the customized notebook;
​
“What if it’s too hard?
I will push through.
What if it’s too rough?
I will push through.
What if it’s too tough?
I will push through.
What if you are just too young?
That’s not true!
Why?
Because, I can do anything I put my mind to!
I believe in you!
Chin up!
Believe in yourself!
Heads high!
I will push through anything I put my mind to!”

​In addition, on the well-known Black Lives Matter activist; Deray McKesson’s Instagram page, I stumbled upon the very famous note that Octivia Burtler wrote to herself. Octivia Wrote;

​On July 15, 2017, I received the very first copy of the self-published final version of my book and following the famous note that Octivia Burtler wrote to herself, I wrote my own version at the last page of the first copy of my book.

I needed God to do something about To Bee a Honey but I was not waiting for a miracle to fall from the sky. Moreover, I had given up on my first book; Heartbeat so quick, I knew what giving up felt like and I was determined not to give up so easily again. Here is what I wrote on July 15, 2017;
​
“I have made myself work so hard to make you so that quitting and giving up on you won’t be easy. You bear witness to many things I carry within me and many people that warm me up and uplift me. I shall be a bestselling writer and you will go above and beyond where my feet can walk and my palms can reach. You were made for women, so you have no choice than to be beautiful, than to be persistent and than to thrive. This is my life and dream that shortly after publication, you will go to the bestselling list and stay up there, whether I believe it or not. You will be acquired by a publisher before the year 2017 ends. So be it. I will find ways to do this. I will confess it and act on it until it is true. I will confess you alive. Women will connect to you, you will liberate them, you will make them happy, you will be their companion, you will be loved. You will be the honey to their lemonade!”

On July 29, 2017 I took a picture of my book surrounded by 15 books that inspired me while writing To Bee a Honey, (big thanks to Morenike Olusanya who designed the cover of To Bee a Honey). Since my book has a crown on the cover I captioned the picture with; “SPOT THE CROWN,” and I posted the picture on Instagram.
 
With a leap of faith, I also tagged all the authors of the 15 books. Of course the 15 authors were famous people and I did not think I would get a response but I told myself that it doesn’t hurt to try. Out of all the 15 authors, only one responded, Pierre Alex Jeanty, the author of Her. At first, I was in shock, and it felt like a dream. I immediately seized the opportunity to pitch myself like my mentor; Tyler Simpson from the America Needs You fellows program taught me to. I told Pierre Jeanty about how his book inspired the title of my book and I quoted the exact page from his book (Page 80) where he wrote;
“To describe her is to write sweet poetry about the beauty of life and survival.”

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Few minutes after, Pierre Alex Jeanty responded and asked me if I would not mind sending him a signed copy of my book. I thought to myself; “This man is an outstanding author of 4 books and he has over 400k followers so how and why in the world did he care to respond to me?”

The next day, I mailed a copy of my book to Pierre Alex Jeanty, and in about 2 weeks, I got another response from him saying;
“I appreciate it as an author and interested in it as a publisher.”
 
That was how I landed a publishing deal and achieved a goal, because I pitched myself and networked when I had the opportunity to. To Bee a Honey will be republished by Pierre Alex’s company; Jeanius Publishing in March 2018.
 
I am sharing this story so that many writers who have hopes of publishing their books can see that, it is a journey that requires consistency, determination and support. Speaking of support, there were some days that I would be so frustrated and I would send hundreds of words, just ranting to my closest friends who understand like Olanrewaju Oranyeli. There were days that all it took to rekindle my hope was to hear a friend like Kanyinsola Olorunnisola say to me “I am proud of you” or like Abdulsalam Abdul Dante saying; “Great things and people come from the Bronx” or like Jesudamilare Adesegun-David asking; “How can I make your day better?” or my mother telling me to stop frowning my face and being grumpy or my sisters just listening to all my aspirations and rants about how I will achieve them or my brother saying “Cutie, you look so adorable” when I am tired. I am grateful to other contributions that are unmentioned here.
 
I also realized that, to dream does not cost a thing and the cost is in actualizing the dream. In the process of reaching for the stars, if you don’t know someone who knows someone that will help you, ensure that you keep doing something good every new day, until someone that will help you, finds you. In addition, turn your fears into motivations. I had the fear of quitting on my dreams with To Bee a Honey and so, I gathered motivation to push as hard as I could. Another important lesson is to pitch yourself and stand out every time you have the chance too. I am very grateful to my mentor; Tyler Simpson and the America Needs You fellows program which I am a part of, for always encouraging me to pitch myself and for showing me how.
 
To some people, this is the height of my achievements but to me, this is just the start. I am not “there” yet but this is a start that I am proud of and I think that many people can learn from. I still have even bigger dreams of giving motivational speeches or presentations on TED talks and having signing and reading sessions of my book To Bee a Honey at big book stores like Strand or Barnes and Noble and at big libraries. I will keep working hard and I hope that as you read this reflection, you plan to do the same, diligently in the pursuit of your dreams.
 
To Bee a Honey in Pierre Alex Jeanty’s words means “to write sweet poetry about the beauty of life and survival.” To Bee a Honey means going through stingy experiences and having beautiful outcomes.
 
Above all, I thank God. I had faith that something good will come out from my book; To Bee a Honey and the belief that my dreams were in the hands of someone greater than I, kept me going. Thank you God!
 
This is my story of gratitude and if you think this will motivate someone to start acting on their dreams, don’t hesitate to share this post with them.

P.S: Now that I've shared this story, I can say my 2017 is just officially over. #reflections... my new year new me starts in March  😂. I need February for my savagery, to love shenanigans and experience a potential recovery.

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